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Dr. Kimberly Stearns

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Mental Health

Embracing Lazy

October 4, 2019 //  by kimberly//  Leave a Comment

Sometimes the best self-care is to do nothing at all.

Photo by Lenin Estrada on Unsplash

Does it ever feel like your every waking moment is all about go go go! Full calendars and to-do lists, appointments and assignments, phone calls, emails, and texts all the time!. Too much to do in too little time? Maybe you even feel a secret sense of pride about how stressed and overworked you are? Is there a sense of exhilaration about being the businest person you know?

Sure we all want to suceed and be seen as successful, but burn out is real and wide spread. In this article from Psychology Today it identifies “cynicism, depression, and lethargy” as some of the emotional, mental, and physical signs of the special kind of exhaustion brought on by repeated and prolonged stress. Not exactly what we think of when we think of success.

So what can we do to make sure we don’t hit that horrible point of burn out ourselves? One of the best ways is to take regular, periodic breaks from the stress. There is a reason weekends were invented afterall. But these days so many keep right on working through the weekends, whether for their regular job, or trying to start up or maintain a side hustle. And while all of that is admirable, if it lands you in a state of cynical, depressed lethargy, you aren’t doing yourself or anyone else any favors.

This is exactly why there are times when the best course of action is inaction. When the best thing in the world you can possibly do is to just sit back, relax, and embrace your inner lazy. Why not take that Saturday morning where you would normally rush off to the gym in a compulsive ritual-like way, and luxuriate in bed instead?

Peruse your favorite magazine. Stare out the window. Daydream. Do nothing. Spend time with your pet. This can sometimes be the best recipe for improved mental health and an enhanced happier state of mind. Being still and calm. can bring more tranquility into your life, and even result in a reduction in blood pressure. There are so many health benefits to just taking a little time off now and then.

So once in a while embrace your inner lazy and realize the wonderful effects of this. We all feel driven sometimes to engage in activities that in the end are not helpful to us and may make us feel more harried and frenzied. So take those lazy moments, relish them, enjoy them and reap the wonderful effects. Why not try it this weekend?


https://medium.com/@drkimberlystearnsphd/how-to-have-more-to-be-grateful-for-9d0c4f98267

Category: UncategorizedTag: Burnout, Mental Health, Psychology, Self Care, Self Improvement

How To Have More To Be Grateful For

September 13, 2019 //  by kimberly//  Leave a Comment

Cultivating an attitude of gratitude

Photo by Courtney Hedger on Unsplash

It may sound cliche, but there are tremendous benefits to learning to cultivate an attitude of gratitude. Studies show that people who regularly express gratitude, either through keeping a gratitude journal, giving thanks in the evening before eating with family, or even just taking a moment to think about all the good things in their lives each day, enjoy better physical and mental health than those who do not.

Why would this be?

Because people who are grateful notice and appreciate the positive things already in their lives.

Doing this makes them feel happier. Happy people tend to reach out more for social interactions. They are less likely to be lonely because they feel good about themselves and about being around other people. They are more likely to exercise regularly, to remember to go to the doctor and dentist for regular check-ups, they have better social skills, coping mechanisms, and better psychological resiliency.

Creating a regular practice of gratitude is easy to do.

There are a number of apps that have been created in recent years to help users track gratitude and happiness. But if it seems strange to use technology for something like this, you can also get out a notebook and put good old fashioned pen to paper. Keeping the notebook at your bedside can help you to remember to record the things you are grateful for each day either upon waking or each night before you go to sleep. It is a good practice to branch out and not just write the same few things every day. If you are grateful for your family, get more specific. What exactly about each family member did you particularly appreciate that day? What about your job was fulfilling and meaningful today? Why did the call from your brother make you feel so good?

Stopping to notice the things that made you grateful one day can inspire you to seek out more of the same in future days, or to pass on the goodwill you received on to others.

Appreciate your brother calling you out of the blue, just to say hi? Your mother would probably love it if you did the same today. Wasn’t it awesome the way your boss praised you in front of the whole department in the meeting? Is there someone in your office that you can do that for today?

Gratitude and happiness are contagious.

They build on each other and quickly spread to others. Peter Drucker once said, “What gets measured gets managed.” This is usually applied to business and analytics, but I want to alter that sentiment slightly so we can apply it to gratitude too:

What gets your attention, grows.

If you put your attention on negative things, you will feel negative. Each small daily stressor that you might easily overcome while in a good mood, suddenly adds to the negativity of the day and makes everything worse. On the flip side, if you put your attention on all of the wonderful things in your life that you are grateful for, you will notice and create more of the things that inspire gratitude. The more grateful you are, the more you have to be grateful for.

Happy gratitude journalling!



https://medium.com/@drkimberlystearnsphd/scarcity-mindset-6088ecc2e903

Category: UncategorizedTag: Gratitude, Happiness, Health, Love, Mental Health

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